The Apocalypse

**Percy** · 22nd-May-2011

There will be a few red faces in the old Culthouse tonight.

It will be some bloke's fault of course.

**zetamale** · 22nd-May-2011

**shaazam** · 22nd-May-2011

Gee I am still here !

**Percy** · 22nd-May-2011

Anyone missing from here?

**Douglas** · 22nd-May-2011

Quote from shaazam

Gee I am still here !

But where is 'here'. Maybe we have all been moved into heaven and can't tell the difference. Or maybe we have all been moved into hell and can't tell the difference. Or maybe we've been in one or the other all along and some other poor sods are living in the real world. Or maybe I need another cup of coffee ... yes, that seems more likely.

**s1taekwon-do** · 22nd-May-2011

I don't want to sound like I'm bragging or anything, but this is the second end of the world I've survived.

**Percy** · 23rd-May-2011

Would we actually notice the ones who 'raptured' were missing? Unless we actually saw them rising up we would simply not hear from them again.

Where is Drex?

Has he gone into a Cumulo Nimbus?

Marx, are you still around here?

**Zuberi** · 23rd-May-2011

Nobody knows when the world's going to end. Not the president, not the pope, not the dumb blond with the toy hammer, NOBODY!

**Percy** · 23rd-May-2011

Zubs ! You're still here !

**Zuberi** · 23rd-May-2011

Quote from Percy

Zubs ! You're still here !

I'm not going anywhere, old fart.

**Dylan MacVillain** · 23rd-May-2011

Quote from s1taekwon-do

has the rapture nabbed anyone yet?

Fudgelickers!!! I missed the rapture again? What the hell? I missed it in '94 too. And this time I was ready too. Or almost ready. I bought one of those rapture robes from some nice man on TV. He even prayed over it. The thing is, I was practicing the week before. You know, deep-knee bends and jumping on a rooftop. I even had a friend play the trumpet for me. Anyways, I was still wearing it when I had supper and I spilled sauce on it. So my robe was actually at the cleaners for the big event! I did see lots of clothes lying around and empty cars with their engines running. I ran over and tried my deep-knee bends and jumping. Oh hell, I'm still here, damn it!

Oh, and BTW, it's not the Four Horsemen anymore. That's not vey Politically Correct. In case people didn't get the memo, it's the Four Horsepeople. You can say the Four Equestrians too, though it doesn't have the same macabre ring to it, if you know what I mean. The Four Horsepeople have been updated to be more gender and color inclusive. They are as follows:

Conquest- A woman, naturally. She is Hispanic and thinks it's racist every time Border Angels want to see her passport before she enters a new realm. She usually needs a boost to mount her steed but still considers herself equal to the other equestrians. She complains that her name is misogynistic and that the others ride too fast.
Slaughter- A black man. He resents the fact that Famine calls everyone else the Quota Trio. He's proud of the fact that he is bigger than his horse, who has an afro-mane and gold teeth.
Famine-A white man. He's a metrosexual and a part-time therapist. His horse has a multi-pastel-colored mane and a velvet saddle. He's prone to asking people how they feel while he starves them to death. He claims it's very cathartic.
Death- A Thai ladyboy. It moonlights as a Cabaret performer and normally offers men one last "favor" before he kills them. Yee haw!!