I was hoping we'd hear back from the individual who started the thread.

Quote from dinohip51

I was hoping we'd hear back from the individual who started the thread.

Same here.

And you let yourself fall into that hell?

Quote from Zuberi

And you let yourself fall into that hell?

If this is someone's life we're talking about, and not a wee-hours college-dorm free-writing effort, which we're still waiting for its author to confirm, it is an honor to be asked for help.

You do make a good point, but there but for the grace of God....

Georgev, despite it all, let us know how you are. No judgement sir.

I might be an old and grumpy skeptic but I find it hard to believe that the OP didn't see any of this coming!!

Either the story is a fake, written for propaganda purposes by some feminist or government organisation, or else the guy is a congenital idiot.
The outpouring of woman-like sympathy (Oh! Poor you!), doesn't tug at my heartsrings, it awakens deep-seated suspicion. Women can be pretty nasty but this story stretches comprehension. If it's true, he certainly knew how to pick a winner.

Quote from Yan Yan

I might be an old and grumpy skeptic but I find it hard to believe that the OP didn't see any of this coming!!

Since the gimped out punching bag hasn't responded to the thread S/he started, I'm going with, troll.

I'm thinking this must be a troll but if it isn't, Lord help him.

Quote from Zuberi

Since the gimped out punching bag hasn't responded to the thread S/he started, I'm going with, troll.

Quote from Hitman

I'm thinking this must be a troll but if it isn't, Lord help him.

As the OP said, he can't even house or feed himself at the moment and is being financially raped by the EUSSR. I imagine he doesn't have the opportunity to go online too much.

I just hope, if the man is genuine, he hasn't hurt himself or been injured by people from his ex's family.

Quote from Zuberi

And you let yourself fall into that hell?

Very easy to happen. Sometimes you just don't see things happening as they are doing, you don't see what a person is like either.

Hindsight, or even observation from another perspective, is wonderful in theory.

Quote from wh666

As the OP said, he can't even house or feed himself at the moment and is being financially raped by the EUSSR. I imagine he doesn't have the opportunity to go online too much.

I just hope, if the man is genuine, he hasn't hurt himself or been injured by people from his ex's family.








Very easy to happen. Sometimes you just don't see things happening as they are doing, you don't see what a person is like either.

Hindsight, or even observation from another perspective, is wonderful in theory.

All very good points but as I am unemployed I've had the chance to stay on here all day lately. Every time I checked the OP's profile since the first post, it indicated that user was online, whatever that may mean. And, my FR remains unanswered.

If this is an example of a desperate man seeking catharsis by just getting it out on a sympathetic-looking site, I can buy that. But also I know that was pretty much how I got here too. I just started with "men's websites" and found one that looked like a good place to bitch. One of the first things I was told, by Yan Yan (who's something of an onsite guru to me now) was:


PARTICIPATE.

Quote from dinohip51

All very good points but as I am unemployed I've had the chance to stay on here all day lately. Every time I checked the OP's profile since the first post, it indicated that user was online, whatever that may mean. And, my FR remains unanswered.

Dino, I would advise you mix things up a little to preserve your sanity. That is, take your time out of AM regularly and expand your mind in different subjects. Too much of anything isn't healthy. Delve into history, economics, philosophy, humanitarianism, astronomy, law etc. Lessons learnt elsewhere pays dividends here. Wisdom is never achieved by fixating on one subject.

Quote from Celtic Druid

Dino, I would advise you mix things up a little to preserve your sanity. That is, take your time out of AM regularly and expand your mind in different subjects. Too much of anything isn't healthy. Delve into history, economics, philosophy, humanitarianism, astronomy, law etc. Lessons learnt elsewhere pays dividends here. Wisdom is never achieved by fixating on one subject.

Well put, and well meant, I want to assume. Thanks, (I think).

Actually, our household is on the verge of a big move and a lot of changes, for the better, we're all hoping. We're trying to find our way back to New Mexico where we came from and flee this cow town, and big things are right around the corner. Right now, I'm just killing time. And actually, the interaction with folks here (20 friends a/o today) has been very liberating. I have been pointed in all kinds of new directions, and am learning a language of online chats (behind the scenes) and PMs that includes links to resources, articles and ideas that I never could have assembled on my own, and shared a lot of my own thoughts and sources with others privately too. It's better than community college, actually, which is as high a level as I ever attained formally.

If you're suggesting that I tend toward obsession, take a number. A change of sites won't help with that, it has deep roots.
In fact, addressing the obsessions, fixations, assumptions and sloganeering of others is helping more than you may think.
If there's a more critical issue buried in your post, send me a PM.

But, let's see:

History. I make reference to it constantly, with sources, and discussion seldom ensues beyond emotional reactions to a misunderstanding of it.

Economics. I have asserted for months that feminism is a socioeconomic behavioral shift, within history, and no movement at all. Similar results.

Philosophy. Similar topics raised by me, similar results.

Humanitarianism. If I haven't included that in every post, I am much remiss. Not for lack of trying.

Astronomy. Can't help you there.

Law. I've posted statutes, quotes from rulings, and discussions of procedural issues at great length. Again, emotional reactions and generalized denunciations of the system ensue.

If you simply don't WANT to have a content-rich, detail-oriented discussion about specifics, all you have to do is say so. But to suggest I need to move on for issuing this invitation daily to people who have come to mean something to me, is hurtful, and I don't think you meant it that way.

This is a topic which repeats over and over, what to do against the crooked justice applied to men. My post really joins Richard’s post, and circumstances are pretty similar. I can write books about this whole crap, but will try to keep it short and come to the point.
Married in 2006 with Chinese woman. Problems started immediately after and she tried to fully control me. Behind my back searching my pockets and work bag, continuously calling my office to make sure that I was there, telling me what to drink and eat and when, continuously starting hefty discussions, sometimes lasting all night, from which you can only escape if you give her right, etc.

Son born in 2009. She has never worked in Europe, and I thought that giving her an occupation might change her, and of course, I wanted to have a child too. Instead, a bar of dynamite was ignited. Screaming and yelling from morning till evening, I was not allowed anymore to prepare food for myself, not listening to doctors for my son’s care but instead researching everything in the internet, continuously demanding to go see a specialist with my son because he didn’t laugh all day, or he said the same word all day, and the internet gave it as sign for some disease, forcing my son to eat, screaming if he refused, screaming if he vomited, yelling at me to clean up, and immediately feeding again, often up to 3-4 times.
It got so bad, and as I did not know what to do anymore, and had to take action, I contacted the CPS (France). They told me to write a letter to the head of justice in our department, which I did. Result: investigation by social assistant and doctor, and they confirmed my letter, and my letter was also confirmed by my son’s doctor.

Court hearing, and although plenty of proof, the judge (all judges are women) could not decide and wanted a deeper investigation to be done. This dragged on for about 1 year, meanwhile doing nothing at all about my son’s situation. The investigation, 30 minute discussion with psychiatrist, which of course turned out negative, and investigation by social assistant. In one of the meetings, my wife forbid the social assistant to talk to a few important witnesses, and … the SA never did. Witness reports which I send, certified, mysteriously got lost and were never received. My wife was never asked a single question about the treatment of our son, instead they let her talk and all she did was accuse me (alcoholic, violent, dangerous, …), things for which I have submitted proof that they are false, but my proof is not being considered, and I am the bad person.
I am a diabetic, and when screaming started each time when I wanted to fix something to eat, I decided to only take one meal a day at work. The result: my sugar levels became very unstable with many severe hypoglycemia (brain has no energy anymore with as result loss of muscle control, followed by coma). In order to help me, all that has to be done is give me a shot with a hormone which makes the liver release glucose, and this is an obligation to give me this, but she refuses to help me. When it happens, takes her camera and starts making pictures, and when I am unconscious she calls the emergency number. Comment from cops and emergency team: inhuman, nothing more, nothing is done. I cannot tell you how many times wall and floor were covered in blood from me hitting my head, and how many times I had to drag myself, as good as I could, to the neighbors for help.

Talking about violence, she provokes me continuously with insults that cut into your heart, beatings, and worst, in December 2011, she planted a sharp piece of wood in my neck. I get up a 5 am in order to get a few things done before she wakes up and makes the rest of the day to hell. My son wakes up at 6 am. She puts him with me in my office and I assume, returns back to bed (she is day and night on her laptop). About half an hour later she suddenly enters my office and wants to take a stack of work documents. I get up, holding my son in my arms and block her the way. Immediately she put something very sharp in my neck and pushes full force. I feel blood running and as I did not want to bring my son in danger, who was at that point already crying very loud, I put him down and started pushing my wife back to the door. She didn’t let go of the sharp object for one second. Near the door, she suddenly quit, took my son and left. On the ground I found a sharp piece of wood which looked like it had been ripped from a door frame. I called the cops, they didn’t have time. So, I carefully put the wood in a plastic bag and went to the cops myself. I do my story, the cop looks at the wound in my neck, and asked why I came bothering them which such a small injury !!! (can you imagine what would have happened if it was me who had done this to my wife???)
One month later, my wife filed charges against me, with medical certificate stating that she had a bruise on her thigh. The cops took me in for questioning and I did my story once more about what happened in December. 3 months later the case was dismissed because of lack of evidence. My wife told the cops that I did the injury myself. I asked the cops why they didn’t take finger prints. Answer “That’s too late now Sir. By now everyone has had it in their hands”.

Last year my wife started brain washing my son. At night when he goes to bed, we had a real tradition which maybe took 5 minutes. She starts by pushing my son in her room and locking the door (she sleeps with my son in the same bed, keeps 2 rooms locked, and even when my son sleeps alone, she locks the door, but was for the SA also no issue at all …). My son starts crying and wants to be with me. The next day, she counts to 3 and if my son has not entered her room, she turns off all of the lights (it was Winter), leaves my son in the dark at the edge of the stair case. You can imagine his screaming. It took only a few days to make my son afraid for wishing me good night. And similar with other things. She has my son watching tv all day. My son is on my lap and watches his favorite cartoon. She turns the TV off. My son starts crying and gets up, goes to mom. She turns the TV back on. And that repeats several times till my son realizes that he is being punished if he comes by me.
She does nothing anymore herself, but uses my son as a tool, and my son is very much afraid for her. When she is there, command in Chinese and he beats me, throws his toys at me, beats me with his toys, pees against the little couch where I sleep, pees against my office door, destroys whatever is dear to me. And that while she is standing there enjoying and smiling. He refuses to give me a kiss because mom says that I am dirty and stink. Only a while after she is gone on her laptop, he gives me a kiss.

Finances. 2 years back I noticed the enormous sales she did in the internet, for example 40 pairs of shoes for my son (because “she doesn’t have the time to go to the store” !!!). She bought in 6 months for about 14k euros, withdrew about 8000 euros in cash, although I had set a 500 euro limit on her card. The trick, she “lost her bank card”, and it was replaced, and she used the number from an old card of mine, no limit, which I had already destroyed at the bank, sed her replacement card and the number of the lost one. When the accounts were almost empty her attorney went to the judge and requested 50k euros from me at divorce. The judge accorded her 12k euros and my bank accounts were blocked, leaving me with 1000 euros, just when I had to pay my taxes (not withheld at the source in France). Since then I am living in misery. Am most of the time unable to go see a doctor, buy food, buy medical supplies for my diabetics, pay the bills. She lives in luxury in the house I pay for. She emptied a bank account holding a big loan which my father gave us in 2006, in order to buy property, she emptied my Swiss bank accounts. Court has all the proof but does nothing.

The average duration of a divorce in France is 2 years, consisting of 2 court hearings. A first one for conciliation, where the judge wants to make sure that you want to divorce and where the judge decides about the separation. Delay: 8 months. And then the final hearing, if everything is agreed upon, after 2 – 2.5 years.
The attorneys. First lady which I had (I thought there was nothing better to beat a woman than a woman) insulted me continuously, asking if I know how to change diapers and more crap. I changed to who is called the best attorney in town. She told me immediately that all judges are afraid for China and that I wouldn’t make any chance. She lied to me for 6 months, telling me that the demand for divorce had been done, but when I asked for a copy of all paper work, no response. By coincidence I found out that she had done nothing at all. I changed to an attorney in a different town (attorneys are like mafia here), specialized in tough cases.
All the delay gave my wife the opportunity to file for divorce. My attorney jumped in immediately and filed for divorce with fault, including all the evidence against my wife.
First hearing and there is first an individual talk with the judge, an old bitch, ready for retirement. My wife was in 15 minutes, me, the judge allowed me only to answer with one word to 2 questions. Do you want to divorce, what is your nationality. Do you speak French? Are you sure you speak French?
My wife’s attorney got to talk for 45 minutes, bringing up the single point she had for my wife, a job offer in China and she has to start working Oct 9^th. They are giving me 2x 2 weeks to see my son, in China, and under supervision.
My attorney started presenting her file and was interrupted after 10 minutes. The judge didn’t have the time. Decision will be announced Sept 17^th.

I am fully broken. This is what they call justice. Have also been thinking about filing a case with the ECHR, as almost the whole list of human rights is being broken, but will it be accepted? I’m fully fed up with this system and would prefer to just run away, hide in the jungle someplace.
My son, he is hurting me the most. He has been fully brain washed, and will he ever recover? I think more and more that he is lost, and I am almost ready to wish them both to fu… China.

Anyone has any advice?