I am an adult who used to be 110 (was small my whole life) until a year or two ago and now I am 210. You know what I think, I think it's something in the food we buy at the grocery store. Too much high fructose corn syrup or some other fattening thing that is in 90% of what is on the shelf at your local supermarket. Most people can't eat organic for various reasons.

You may be tempted to point the finger at yourself (or others individually) until you look around and see that we/they are ALL (as in majority) getting fat. If everyone is dying of cancer, do you blame individual people or do you look for a common cause?

So no, I don't blame single motherhood for that. I blame single motherhood for alot of other things but not that.

Fat Cardassians lack gravitas.



You'd better get back into fighting form, Garack.

Good to see you again. Its been a while.

Quote from Percy

Fat Cardassians lack gravitas.



You'd better get back into fighting form, Garack.

Good to see you again. Its been a while.

Good to see you too Percy.

LOL, now I have more weight to throw around in a fight.

Hi, yes what you say is the main point - we could juxtapose obiesity/anexoria/child abuse to ANYTHING ie sunspot cycle, global warming, etc. BUT, and here's the point - single mothers are RESPONSBILE for the kids. Thus if kids become obiese/anexoric who is at fault? OK, we can blame food companies for the additives they put in food. OK, in that case the answer is "good home cooking". What's so hard about buildig a bit of beef, fresh vegetable and making say a stew? Knowledge aout additives in food is commonplace. So what do we do - we avoid such foods. Its a bit like saying we know where the crime/drug/ spots are in acity, but we would allow our kids to play/be there and then say "ah its the police's fault because they are not doing their job". Nope, its the parents fault for letting them play in an area they know is dangerous. Similarly, if a kid is obiese, the fault is PRIMARILY the (mothers). In our society, courts "award" mothers kids becuase they are seen as the better parent - surely obiesty is a main arguement that if mothers cannot look after the healht of a child, they shoudl not have that child. This is why I ask is there are studies to see if obiesity/anexoria is linked to single mothers. Similarly, it would be interesting to see if the statisitics that relate to obiese/anexoric kids who are with the father. I am preapred to bet that the MAIN/PRIMARY cause of obiesity/anexoria is lazy mothers. (Of course the mothers might claim they have no time to cook, in which case they ergo - have no time to have children). This topic would make great material for phd student in sociology and would be a major nail in the coffin of the arguement that the mother is the best parent, and this arguement would then be "scientifically" proven. In the US, crime statistics show that most young offenders in prison come from single parent (ergo mother) families. But I would love to hear others opinions.

While there is much evidence that single parent homes put kids at a disadvantage.

I think on the matter of obesity it has more to do with diet and lack of exercise.

We live in a technological world now where video games and television provide entertainment without phsical exertion.

Not to mention we live in a paranoid nanny society that tells us if our kids go outside then they will be kidnapped or shot in a drive by shooting.

To be honest as a father I am the one more likely to let my kids eat unhealthy food than is my ex. While I do make them eat healthy food I fudge the rules a bit more often.

So I think this issue has less to do with single parenting than it does attitudes within society.

Interesitng a lazy dad oooh! Hey, when I have my son for the weekend I cook good food - and you know why? Becuase I am lazy! I have found that when I cook good food, it actually works out CHEAPER than "ready food" and has much higher quality - and that way we eat less. "Traditional food" I think is easier to cook - for example I make a whole large pot of say chili con carne and then make a pile of jacket potatoes - (usually in the microwave) and its food for several days. Chili con carne also freezes well, so o Sunday I can put the rest in small containers and freeze them. Then I might make a big pot of stew, thus I cook once nd have good foood for several days. I make "fun" food with my son sometimes like pancakes (dead easy) and these can be eaten with jam or nutella, which deals with the sugar urge (-:

I have to jump all over this thread. I am very concerned with today's youth and the plight of single mothers. I am also very concerned with today's youth in regards to healthy eating habits. I am not in agreement that there are only high fructose corn syrupy foods on the shelves. I even think like Richard, that it is easier to make a healthy pot of good grub than to actually open the can that makes you fat. Get the kids off the couches and outdoors, go play with them, this will help the belly bulge if you have one. Get active when you don't have the kids, show the example. Many mom's don't like physical exercise and don't get out with the kids, my son is down right lazy and cries if we WALK somewhere. I am sick of it. He was diagnosed with ADHD. I wreaked havoc on the school board and mommy. There is no way I was going to condone my kid taking methalin or adderall or ritalin or any other kind of junk. These kids need to be in the street playing hockey (safely of course)and yelling "car", they need a good pot of spaghetti to fill em up and then take them to the park, throw a baseball, sometimes long, and make em run. My kid is the calmest boy I know, he just needs more time outdoors and time with other boys playing sports, not "wii". That is not what I consider a sporting activity, swinging an imaginary tennis racket!!

If ppl are overweight, it is their fault. They simply eat to much in one sitting and eat shit food. I hear way to often "its a glandualr problem" Well most north americans have galandualr problems then. Funny, all the guy's I know and hang out with, are healthy, have good muscle tone, and can run or bike for miles. Me included and I smoke. What do we have in common besides a six pack stomach, good food in a appropriate amount, and mostly we exercise!!!! I am not a health nut, I just like playing sports and would rather bike to the store than wasting time starting the car, letting it warm up, wasting gas and money, just to not walk or bike a few blocks.

My son needs more positive influence in his life, and mom is not giving it by letting him stay in the house while she hen's at him. He needs to get some bruises, scrapes, and a good thorough adrenalin rush a home-run will give him in front of some peers. I am only allowed by the courts a few hours a week. I am fighting for more, at the mercy of the judge. I would love to take the boy out to activities as much as I could. I was told by my son that he had a pair of skates when I asked him. He said they were two years old, had never been worn, and didn't fit anymore. He is 7. Why was my son given skates and then not shown how to use them. I was ripped out of his life at this point, hadn't seen him for two+ years. I got that fixed, but my boy lost all drive to go outdoors and be active, his schooling is suffering and they are blaming it on ADHD.
I called bullcrap on that, and had him taken off the meds, I educate him in the few hours I have him. He hates me for it, but he is at least passing second grade now.<

So to all the overweight ppl, get off your arse and start some activities to burn the calories. You can't lose the fat you ingest if you don't sweat it out and raise the heart rate. If you don't lose the weight, it is simple, you are lazy and don't want to do the work and continue to ingest high fructose corn syrupy foods. So if you lead a sedentary life, than don't eat so much and suffer from an empty belly once in a while for god's sake, will a little break in between healthy meals kill you if you don't snack on that twinky?

As for single mom's, get out of the house more, stop thinking it's all about you and start doing more activities that will create a healthy kid. Pokemon and video games is not a healthy lifestyle. Balance is the answer. Teach the kids that a little video games is alright AFTER they went out to spend some energy that they have in spades at that age. And you wonder why lots of boys are hyper, they have no outlet for natural abundance of energy, we call then ADHD!! I am going to stop because I get so riled up when I hear this and excuses like the "it is the companies fault they sell high fructose syrupy foods" Don't fucking buy them!!! Eat an apple instead!!

Quote from chevalier

I think on the matter of obesity it has more to do with diet and lack of exercise.

To be honest as a father I am the one more likely to let my kids eat unhealthy food than is my ex. While I do make them eat healthy food I fudge the rules a bit more often.

So I think this issue has less to do with single parenting than it does attitudes within society.

I disagree, and I'll outline roughly why...

Quote from Richard

Hey, when I have my son for the weekend I cook good food - and you know why? Becuase I am lazy! I have found that when I cook good food, it actually works out CHEAPER than "ready food" and has much higher quality - and that way we eat less.

Like Richard, when my kids come over, I cook real food with them - on occasion we'll do McDogcraps or the local chip-shop - but that is not typical for my time with them. Cooking with the kids does cost less than taking them to a fast-food joint and is often just as cheap as going to the chip-shop. Not only that, but it's real 'father/daughter' time for me and them because I get them to help in the kitchen (supervised at all times). We've gone from me showing them, to me telling them and them doing it, to me asking them how they'd do it. Because of all the practise I've given them, they're able to cook relatively simple meals without any major issues now. Something they could NOT do a year back. All the time they spend with their mother and whatever boyfriend she's got that week, and they haven't been taught basic cooking. Sure, she cooks... but by our children's own admissions (both of them), she only cooks junk-style foods (burgers, fries, waffles, etc.) This only came up in subject because they told me they don't have gravy on their meals at home. I asked why not and they said "we don't have these kinds of meals at home." I pressed further and asked what 'kind' of meals do they have at their mother's and they listed the above and other related junk foods.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no master-chef or suchlike - I've only recently began learning to cook for myself. Two years ago, I was happy to eat junk all the time and accept invites from friends or family for dinner. Now, I'm able to invite friends and family for dinner. Now my kids can help me in the kitchen with the basics (I focus a lot of teaching on safety, like using oven-mits or pointing the pan-handles inwards so they can't be pulled over by accident, etc.)

A friend of mine was the same, he always let the wife cook until they went their separate ways - once she'd gone and left him with the kids, he had no choice in the matter. Now he cooks fantastic meals!

This isn't about being a single-parent. This is about certain types of single-parents... and I have to say, that in MY experience, most of the single-dads I know do perfectly well cooking decent foods on a daily basis.

To Richard and Karl. Reread what I said please. I did not say I was a lazy dad and I take offense to that assertion Richard.

I in fact said that I make him eat healthy but I am a bit more likely than his mom to let him have a treat.

How the hell that equates to my being a lazy dad I don't know. Is it because I let my kid have a dang twinkie once a week?

And I never said that dads cannot or do not cook healthy meals for their children. I in fact cook healthy meals for my son.

Jeez did I friggin type in Chinese or something? It looks English on my screen.

Or did I use that awful American English so many here hate so much?

Maybe what I said was taken out of context because I threw my ex a bone maybe?

The message was simple. Childhood obesity comes down to more than whether the child lives in a single parent home or not.

I wasn't defending the institution of single parenthood.

Childhood obesity happens in homes where both parent are present as well.

Quote from chevalier

To Richard and Karl. Reread what I said please. I did not say I was a lazy dad and I take offense to that assertion Richard.

I in fact said that I make him eat healthy but I am a bit more likely than his mom to let him have a treat.

How the hell that equates to my being a lazy dad I don't know. Is it because I let my kid have a fucking twinkie once a week?

And I never said that dads cannot or do not cook healthy meals for their children. I in fact cook healthy meals for my son.

Jeez did I friggin type in Chinese or something? It looks English on my screen.

Or did I use that awful American English so many here hate so much?

Maybe what I said was taken out of context because I threw my ex a fucking bone maybe? Was it because I failed to insult her or something?

The message was simple. Childhood obesity comes down to more than whether the child lives in a single parent home or not.

I wasn't defending the institution of single parenthood.

Childhood obesity happens in homes where both parent are present as well.

Most chefs are men so yeah men absolutely can cook great and healthy meals. Indeed obesity is happening across all demographics but it's not the food, many say.

I think the food is part of the problem but not all of the problem.

Quote from chevalier

I think the food is part of the problem but not all of the problem.

Most people won't even admit that the food is part of the problem though. Most everything you buy from the grocery store is either boxed, canned or frozen, most of which have high sodium.

Hi Nick, I totally agree with you. Boy (especially boys) need to get out and run around a lot and burn off energy. The trend is now to lables boys natural energy as an illness - and the current trendy illness is ADHD. As a sociologist with higher research degrees, I say that 95% of ADHD is complete bullshit. There are loads of documentaries on indeed how it is bullshit. Here in the UK there was a very interesting 3 part programme called "The Classroom Experiment" on BBC TV where teh UK's top educational expert (a man) was given the run of a school for 3 months to put his latest ideas into practice. He began school with 30 mintues execercise everyday and within 2 weeks most teachers were amazed how better the kids behaved AND PERFORMED in class. (you can google/torrents/you tube up the programme. It is easies to say a kid is not normal and ump them full of medication. Perhaps you rmemeber the incidents with kids going into schools and machine gunning down everyone they saw - and the common denominator was that they were on Prozac - which now carries official warnings that taking it can lead to suicide or deep depression. Shows you how much miedcation is "reserached" before given to kids.

oops so stupid of me to say that - for usually it is THE KIDS that pharmaceutical companies are expiermenting on. And again there are many interesting doucmentaries on this. Nick, if you are very concerned you can google up CCHR and watch their videos, maybe get some support.

I wish you the best of luck with your son and your struggle - I have been fighting with the courts for 5 years so I have some idea of the pain you suffer daily. Remember, one day, your son will thank you for being there for him

I think that eating disorders stem from many facets of today's life style. Both anorexia and over eating stem from many emotional and physical responses to the present day environment. Ppl are leading very sedentary life styles, example, me sitting here in front of my PC screen while I could be out riding a bike and burning precious calories if I were overweight and not healthy. the work place has become more automated in general except for a select few work places where man power is still needed. You don't see many obese auto mechanics or construction workers. I know there are some, but they are really a minority. Anorexia and overeating also stem from child hood issues and low self esteem and many more I am probably not familiar with. Passive aggressiveness, anger management issues, perpetual victim issues and many more lead to wanting to fill a void food often fills if just for a brief moment. Many women will overeat, and in the case of an anorexic, expunge the excess by way of regurgitation or some woman will willfully gain wait to prevent men from approaching them. A kind of comfort barrier if you will. Passive aggressiveness will often lead to eating disorders also, a form of punishing ones self or a significant other when a proper anger management method is not available to the person.

Some ppl will eat in excess because they feel empty, I remember one lady, morbidly obese, who was in drug rehab with me back when. When I asked her why she ate so much and why when she ate, it was obviously such a thrill and evident comfort to her. She had explained to me, that when she was very young, her mother had abandoned her, her grandmother had taken the role. When this little girl would arrive home, granny would be at work to support this new child in her life, but always left a plate of food in the oven, or a slice of cake on the table, or a surprise in her lunch box. This little girl equated food to comfort, love, availability in the face of loved ones absent. While granny was away, the food was there to remind her that granny had thought of her. So she adopted this habit to compensate for a child hood abandonment issue. I see this happening way more often with the proliferation of the single parent household. The kids come home from school, latch key kids they use to call em back in the day, now it is so common no one ever says anything about it anymore. They are left to themselves, raid the fridge of the foods they prefer, sit and play x-box till mom or dad comes homes at 7pm from a long commute, and pretty much raise themselves. Eating makes you feel good, it is natural, what could come of it right? In excess anything is bad, diabetes is the next plague. The health systems will crash due to it. Obesity is way to underestimated and is just starting to gain the recognition it deserves. It is horrible to be obese and left out since you can't keep up in sports, many jobs are not available to you, your health is pitiful, just going up stairs or walking to the store is an exercise in itself, yet many still gorge cuz that 15th chicken wing is just so good, and something that feels this good just can't be replaced.

Food is replacing common sense, a quick "hungry man dinner" in the micro wave which has major fatty carbs and zero healthy calorific value, a slab of cake replaces a boyfriend on a lonely night, three bags of chips while watching the football game replaces camaraderie and physical exercise in its place.

Think about it next time you say to yourself, I should go out more, ride a bike, climb a hill in the forest, or go swimming with some friends. Don't just think about, do it! It might just help you along the way and give you a nice glow most ppl equate to a healthy, balanced person.