It's not just men who abuse

**frostyboy** · 10th-November-2009

Written by Theresa Gannon for The Guardian:

It's not just men who abuse

The rise in the number of children identifying a female as their
sexual abuser is worrying. However, it is not surprising.

As a professional working with both male and female sexual
abusers, I have often been faced with male sexual abusers who
report having been sexually abused by a female when they were
children. Yet there are very few women in prison for sexual
offences against children. So where are all the female sexual
abusers?

Historically it has been hard for society to accept that women
abuse children: we believe women are nurturers. Because society has got stuck in the mindset that only men abuse children, victims of female abusers fear telling anyone in case they are disbelieved. Boys, in particular, appear reluctant to tell others that they are being abused by a woman.

The figures released by the NSPCC challenge the idea that sexual abuse is a male-perpetrated crime. Female sexual abuse has begun to receive more attention in society as the result of several recent high-profile cases – such as that of the nursery worker Vanessa George.

Despite the increase in the number of children identifying a female as their sexual abuser, very few children have officially reported this abuse. Where, then, do we go from here? Are we doing all we can to protect and safeguard children from sexual abuse? What should we be watching out for?

Recently I interviewed convicted female sexual abusers in England to understand more about how they abuse children. The results shed some light on how we can further protect children.

First, like male sexual abusers, all women who abused children knew their victims well. However, unlike their male counterparts, female abusers tended to offend alongside a man – in fact, well over half did.

Being female also seemed to have advantages for keeping the victim "quiet". Sometimes women used the very fact they were female to dissuade the victim from "telling" ("who would believe you?"). What can we take from this?

The first step towards protecting children from abuse is to be aware of the various forms it can take. It would be a sad state of affairs if we felt unable to trust anyone with our children, but we should not accept that they are automatically safeguarded from abuse just because a female is present. . Parents should remain vigilant.

We may already tell children they shouldn't "keep secrets" with adult males. Children may also be told to report any inappropriate touching from males. But are children aware that an abuser may be female? Are we taking the trouble to make it clear to children that women may also touch inappropriately and ask children to "keep secrets"? I am not suggesting we become hyper-vigilant to the point of ridiculousness. But it is our responsibility to ensure that we protect children from all types of sexual abuse.

**Daveyone** · 10th-November-2009

http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/...eports-on-rise
I think by now it should be assumed both men and woman are capable
of attrosities as is it is possible for their to be caring parents of both sexes so could this be some form of absurd equality that makes it not so un heard of for a guy to be a nurary school teacher for instance

http://www.daveyonefamilylawman.blogspot.com/

**johnkimble1** · 10th-November-2009

Not so bad for a Guardian article, but still biased and flawed in places.

As the commets suggest, the writer is very much of the mindset of"there must be a man somewhere to blame". She fails to appreciate the reason that most convicted female sex offenders had a male accomplice is because we only seek out male paedophiles and pretend females ones don not exist.

Female paedophiles are thus mostly only caught as a result of them operating alongside a male, i.e. by accident. Any of them operating alone are above suspicion, or at least above prosecution when caught.

**Daveyone** · 10th-November-2009

Right Minded woman should respond to this as it makes their Genuine cases very tenuous like when my ex took my boys and 4X4 to a refuge, when they learned I had a robust contact order they threw her out coz she had no right being ther as the judge had realised neither she nor the kids were at risk!

http://daveyonefamilylawman.blogspot...-painless.html

**coffeecup248** · 11th-November-2009

The shits gonna hit the fan, at least here in Britain, because for years women and the feminists have been shouting from the rooftops that (all) men are the exclusive sexual abusers of children, and theyve really gone to town shaming men.

but now we're starting to see the truth, that women sexually abuse children too, and I'll tell you this, there will be a lot of anger, quite rightly.

then the psychological and emotional abuse of children by women will also be recognised.

and women cannot defend themselves against any charge, neither abuser nor hypocrisy, because they are guilty on all counts.

**Popadibs** · 11th-November-2009

It is the presumption of innocence and elimate of surprise that women hold over men that has allowed them to shame men into submission for so long.

Quote from coffeecup248

The shits gonna hit the fan, at least here in Britain, because for years women and the feminists have been shouting from the rooftops that (all) men are the exclusive sexual abusers of children, and theyve really gone to town shaming men.

but now we're starting to see the truth, that women sexually abuse children too, and I'll tell you this, there will be a lot of anger, quite rightly.

then the psychological and emotional abuse of children by women will also be recognised.

and women cannot defend themselves against any charge, neither abuser nor hypocrisy, because they are guilty on all counts.

**Percy** · 11th-November-2009

Historically it has been hard for society to accept that women
abuse children:

This use of 'society' as a skirt to hide behind obscured the predominant role that 'historically' women have had in setting mores. She actually means it has been hard for WOMEN to accept - eg: Queen Victoria adamantly refusing to countenance that there could be such a person as a 'Lesbian'. It has never been in women's self-interest to say out loud that other women can be bitches. They say it on a whim behind their hands to one another about specific women they personally don't like.

Modern 'society' is so dominated by female that no-one even hears a male voice, child or otherwise.

**coffeecup248** · 11th-November-2009

also, women and the feminists know that when they attack someone else (in this case, men as a group), the spotlight and attention is moved away from them and their bad behaviour.

attack is the best form of defence. (or so they think).

the problem is they cannot keep attacking a largely innocent and decent group of people forever. one day (and that day has come), people will learn the truth.

**coffeecup248** · 11th-November-2009

Quote from Percy

It has never been in women's self-interest to say out loud that other women can be bitches. They say it on a whim behind their hands to one another about specific women they personally don't like.

yeah, I think that they dont want to draw attention to another womans bad behaviour for fear of being seen in the same light (by men), and the fear that they could all lose their priviledges too.

but the problems of hiding female bad behaviour become so great that society is pushed too far, and the male self-delusion that women are passive goddess like creatures falls apart.