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Thread: Signing off your rights and child support

  1. #1
    AdensDad's Avatar
    AdensDad is offline Established Member
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    Signing off your rights and child support

    I've mentioned this a few times in this site that my son's mother signed off her rights and avoided child support that way. A few people have asked me about this. If this is an exclusive thing women get to do and men do not, or if it's a certain thing only certain people get to do in certain states.

    I looked it up and here's the facts. Anyone can sign off their rights and therefore avoid paying child support, but only in the case of an adoption.

    My son's mother's situation is that her mother in-law adopted her kids. In that situation she was allowed to sign off her rights and avoid paying child support. By doing so, she also gave up her rights to visitation. But no one can do this unless someone else adopts the child.

    A father can "give up his rights" to a child and avoid paying child support if another man "adopts" the child, even if the mother has custody. This also works the other way around. If I- for instance- remarried it would be possible for my new wife to "adopt" my son. I would still have all my rights, but his mother would then be able to give up her rights and avoid paying support.

  2. #2
    Percy's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    As I have said previously, it is not signing off a 'right' it is abandoning a Responsibility.

    This may be convenient all round in a case of Adoption, but it is still what it is - handing over responsibilities, not rights.

    The child that has rights to its parents. Who 'signs off' those?
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  3. #3
    AdensDad's Avatar
    AdensDad is offline Established Member
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    A bad person. I don't think anyone disagrees with that.

  4. #4
    Garak's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    When I was young and constantly arguing with parents I tried that "it's my right" tactic. I was always told that a child under 18 has no rights.

    As an adult I can see that times have changed and children may have more rights today than their parents do, that doesn't make it right. On the other hand:

    A child does not have a right to their fathers wallet, yet we hear daily that they do. That's just a ploy to extort money from men after their child is kidnapped by the state and given to the mother exclusively, in which case you can see how many rights the child had...NONE.

    A child's rights really are the mothers rights. Of course, should Child Protective Services get involved you'll find that the ultimate power is the state.

    People say the child has a right to it's father, no, it's the father who has the right to the child. Rather, he should have.
    Douglas likes this.

  5. #5
    haahoo's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    The state just wants someone to pick up the tab for its raising of future tax payers.

    They don't care where the cash comes from and what means they use to get it..

    Dads have been milked, because it was always traditional to take the work of men, and easiest, because men "dont mind" so much as they (haha! used to!) have excess resources that they can produce..

    I have always wondered about this ridiculous idea that adulthood can be specified by the state to be simply a number.. 18..

    Its BS..

    A family is responsible for its own.. (though the state heavily props up the childrearing/brainwashing) up to the age of 18..

    Then the state steals the family produce and puts it to the treadmill..

    Who are we raising our kids for?

    We raise taxpayers, we do the work the state has (not yet!) found a way of doing better..

    As parents we get little time with our kids, none in the case of many fathers..

    We deserve more respect from the state..

    The state should serve us, but, has perversely pulled a fast one on us in that we are now serving something that is bashing us down too far..

    The camels back is breaking..

  6. #6
    haahoo's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    Is the state party to our decisions to create families?

    To have sex?

    To make babies?

    IS IT REALLY THE STATES BUSINESS?

    The kids belong to the parents.

    Yet, under law, that is clearly not the case.

    The law is perverse.

  7. #7
    Unregistered's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    i dont agree with that at all and i dont think its right for anyone to judge someones reason to sign off rights. it doesnt make you a bad person my ex had a one night stand and found out two years later he had a daughter cuz the stupid woman didnt tell him she was pregnant. she sprang a dna test on him out of the blue and supposedly paternity was established. he got hit with child support and yet cant seem to get a court date to try to get visitation or anything it was 3 yrs ago he was hit with child support out of the blue and he has never seen a picture of his daughter never got to meet her or even hear her voice because the childs mother refuses to let him, so how is it only bad people that sign off rights maybe you should think about what you put before you put it cuz i doubt youve been through or seen every situation for you to have the right to say that

  8. #8
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    Quote Quote from Unregistered View Post
    i dont agree with that at all and i dont think its right for anyone to judge someones reason to sign off rights. it doesnt make you a bad person my ex had a one night stand and found out two years later he had a daughter cuz the stupid woman didnt tell him she was pregnant. she sprang a dna test on him out of the blue and supposedly paternity was established. he got hit with child support and yet cant seem to get a court date to try to get visitation or anything it was 3 yrs ago he was hit with child support out of the blue and he has never seen a picture of his daughter never got to meet her or even hear her voice because the childs mother refuses to let him, so how is it only bad people that sign off rights maybe you should think about what you put before you put it cuz i doubt youve been through or seen every situation for you to have the right to say that
    Amen.
    I am a woman and I've seen cases similar so I agree. Whether a woman is "pro choice" or "pro life" a MAN will have no choice? It seems like it. Even if it was one case where I saw a mistaken drunk one night stand(god forbid any of you male/female ever fall drunk into one) the man will never have a choice of deciding "No. I don't agree and really can not have a child at the moment"... He gets put aside, his situation or his belief on it gets ignored and whatever the "beliefs" of the woman is, is taken into further action, she decides and "BAM here's your child support because I said I'm keeping it." Even if the father wants NOTHING to do with that child, he barely knows the mother AND doesn't even see his child at all (like the case above) that's not right.
    There goes all the dreams that man had because the woman who also had that drunk night, decided to keep something that was made out of an already poorly judged decision of sleeping together.


    My point is- yes it's a delicate subject for politics to get into and they don't want to offend us women. I wouldn't abort a child of my own but I am agreeing on pro choice because I know women who would stop at nothing to get an abortion because of their complicated situation - a man has never been considered into this equation so some women DO at times (not all I said SOME women) take advantage- want to bring a child into this world when they have close to nothing and expect a man to shut up and suit up with whatever decision they make.

    Pro life people: I mean the same... What if a man WANTED to keep the child and a woman wanted to abort?? Would he have a REAL chance to say something? No. It's whatever a woman decides.

    So when a child is about to be included in this equation I think its IMPORTANT for it to be known that a woman now knows she is pregnant for it to be decided early on when she just finds out- WHO agrees to be responsible for that child and who does not. If keeping is what she IS deciding to do and IF putting it for adoption isn't one of the choices.
    Douglas likes this.

  9. #9
    Unregistered's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    My fiance adopted a child at birth and pays child support. The mother makes no effort to let him see the child and demands gas money if she is to bring him or meet us half way. We now have a baby on the way and can't afford to pay child support especially since we never see him. How can my fiance sign his rights away to the adopted child?

  10. #10
    Douglas's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    Quote Quote from Unregistered View Post
    My fiance adopted a child at birth and pays child support. The mother makes no effort to let him see the child and demands gas money if she is to bring him or meet us half way. We now have a baby on the way and can't afford to pay child support especially since we never see him. How can my fiance sign his rights away to the adopted child?
    1) Answering a question on law without knowing the country (and legislative area in the country) can not be done.
    2) The chances are that wherever you are, a man cannot sign his rights away. The chances are far less that he can sign away his responsibilities, which is really what you seem to be asking. If someone else wants to adopt the child, he might be legally free.
    3) Your fiancé adopted the child. That was his concious decision. Why should he be able to sign away anything to do with the child? This thread is not about men just shrugging off 'inconvenient' arrangements that they deliberately made: he should stand by the commitment he has made even if he doesn't like the result.
    The mother makes no effort to let him see the child and demands gas money if she is to bring him or meet us half way.
    4) Make your mind up. Either she makes no effort, or she is willing to spend the time (if not the expense) to help him see his child.
    5) It sounds like the one not making an effort to be involved with his child is your fiancé. I hope he does better with a commitment for his new child than he seems to be doing for his other child. You would have done well to think about that before becoming pregnant by him.
    k_over_hbarc likes this.


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  11. #11
    k_over_hbarc's Avatar
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    Re: Signing off your rights and child support

    I wouldn't be quite so judgemental. While morally it's true that a man that voluntarily signed paperwork should feel more responsibility than in the case of an unintended pregnancy, I am not
    sure about drawing a line for legal purposes. I reckon he adopted the child under pressure from the mother (birth mother or adoptive mother? doesn't really matter here) who I assume was his current girlfriend, and not because he ever desired a permanent relationship with the child.

    But of course that doesn't say anything to defend that poster. It's likely that it's a woman exercising her biological imperative to secure resources for her children at the expense of any other woman's children; that she actively wants or at least encourages him not to see the child; and that she will have no problem demanding child support from him for her child.

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    Douglas likes this.


 

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