I smell something good

**Percy** · 1st-November-2011

Assoc Pressed
1 Nov 2011

Percy releases a fragrance– what do you think?

Following the success of Bruce Willis, Men’s Rights Advocate Percy has released his own official fragrance, which is said to contain the essence of what it takes to be a proper chap in the modern world, along with several exotic-sounding ingredients we’ve never heard of.

According to the manufacturers, the new ‘Parzival’ scent captures his “strength, self-assurance and single-mindedness”.

We sent our reporters out onto the streets to find out what you thought about the latest celebrity to release an official fragrance.

I’ve always wondered, if you could bottle the desperation felt by a man who’s ex-wife took him to the cleaners with the aid of a small army of Family Court officials, Judges, cops, Zozschial Verkers and psychobabblers, what would it smell like. I guess now we’ll know.”
Karl Bloggs, Marriage Counsellor

“I’ve already ordered a couple of bottles for my husband. I mean, is there anything on this planet that smells better than a knackered old shyte in battered armour after a hard day in the Jousts?” Teresa, Pole Dancer

My ex-husband already reeks of sweaty vests and bloody feet, so I’m not sure I see the point of this?” Zubrina McCrankski, Women’s Refuge Director

Have YOUR say.

**paul parmenter** · 1st-November-2011

I have had a good sniff all over my computer and keyboard, Percy, but I still can't smell anything. What am I doing wrong?

**Percy** · 1st-November-2011

You are washing your hands too often, Paul.

**Marx** · 1st-November-2011

Some of those names ring a bell...

**Yan Yan** · 1st-November-2011

Have YOUR say.

Move on my friend, move on.

Those that did harm to you and to those you held dear, do not grieve as you grieve. They merely subscribed to lower standards than the ones you aspired to.

You are washing your hands too often, Paul.

I don't think so. Paul shares many of your (and my) ideals, but he's a pragmatist. We work with with what confronts us. The past can't be undone.

You, above all, must know that new places become the same old old places if you're still carrying the baggage.

Throw it all away. The valuable stuff will fly back to you 100% and all the rubbish will go to the dump.

Battered knights don't have much value. Freethinking men, who have life-experience and a way with words, are pearls of wisdom in a sea of ignorance. Get a new identity and let it invigorate you.

"Sir Percy" is defunct but the skills and knowledge that he might bequeath to his successor would be invaluable.

Well, I had my say. (But ending with "Have your say", means you will get a mixture of sound advice and bullshit in equal measure). How will you sort one from the other? That would be a good project.