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  1. #1
    Percy's Avatar
    Percy is offline Knackered old Knight
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    The Quality of Advive to men

    She has done it once. Can it be forgiven?

    Can it be overlooked.

    What would YOU advise.

    Help! I'm a victim of ID theft -- by my wife



    By Steve Bucci Bankrate.com

    Dear Debt Adviser,

    I just checked my credit reportand found my wife opened an account using my name and information. I have neverused this account. I didn't apply for this credit. Now the account isdelinquent. In your opinion, what is the best way to go about fixing my credit?I look forward to your advice.

    -- Shocked


    DearShocked,
    You have several options, none of them pretty. They all lead back to your wifeand marriage.


    In a nutshell, you have three practicaloptions.

    One is to pay off the debt and close the account.

    The second is to payoff the debt, close the account and freeze your credit to prevent futuresurprises. (Depending on where you live, this may not work, which I'll explainbelow.)

    The third option is to pay off theaccount, leave it open and put yourmarriage on ice.

    You'll notice that all the options require that theaccount be paid off. If it's in your name, short of going to thepolice and filing charges against your wife and, possibly, the mother of yourchildren, you will be better off paying the bill as quickly as you can manage.You'll at least avoid new interest charges, fees and additional credit damage.

    If you haven't already, I believe itwould be best to begin by addressing the situation with your wife.Communicating in a marriage can be difficult in the best of times.Conversations about money issues can be particularly touchy. Nevertheless,finding out why your wife opened an account in your name without your knowledgemay well be the key to your long-term solution.

    (P. Record her excuses on video. Use it as evidence. )

    Let's look at the options you have onceyou have spoken with your wife.

    Option one -- paying and closing theaccount -- is straightforward. I suggest that whoever pays this bill, it bepaid quickly. These things don't improve with age. The sooner this unfortunateincident is behind you both, the better for your credit and your marriage. However,you and your wife need to agree on how financial matters will work between thetwo of you in the future.

    Option two includes freezing yourcredit to avoid new accounts being opened in your name in the future. Yousimply contact thethree credit bureaus and ask for a freeze. There shouldn't be acharge for the freeze, although there may be a small one to thaw a report ifyou want to open a new account in the future. However, this option is morecomplicated if you live in a community property state. In communityproperty states, debts acquired during a marriage are consideredjoint regardless of which party opened the accounts or received the benefits.So a freeze won't necessarily protect you from future surprises. Reaching amutually satisfactory agreement with your wife regarding finances becomes allthe more important.

    Option three is more dire. I stillrecommend you pay the account off as quickly as possible. But if you truly wantto freeze out your wife, you'll need to find an attorney to begin divorceproceedings. This is expensive, upsetting and in my opinion, to be avoided ifat all possible.

    Unfortunately, fixing your credit willtake some time. The damage to your credit as a result of the delinquency isdone. You cannot have this otherwise legitimate negative item removed from yourcredit report unless you claim identity theft and go to the police.

    However, if the one delinquent accountis the only negative item on your report, the damage shouldn't be that bad. Youcan help improve your credit by bringing the account current as soon aspossible. In other words, pay the delinquent amount so the account is no longerreported as a negative each month. Then continue to make payments on time andat agreed terms.

    Once the account is in good standing,the more time that goes by, the more your credit will improve. In two years orless, the late payments on this account will no longer have a significantnegative effect.

    It is hoped that in those two years,communication in your financial relationship with your wife will have improvedas well and your marriage will be the better for it.



    Read more: Hubby unmaskswifes secret credit affair http://www.bankrate.com/finance/debt/help-i-m-a-victim-of-id-theft-by-my-wife.aspx#ixzz1ML7QzJo5
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  2. #2
    Richard's Avatar
    Richard is offline Established Member
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    Re: The Quality of Advive to men

    As the wife went behind the husband's back:
    -Ask why she did this and what she intends to do about it (ie will she pay)
    -If she cannot/will not pay, open a credit account in HER name - take as much cash as you can and leave her a note: "it was fun while it lasted, I'm off to find a younger woman", take the kids with you. In court tell the judge she is immature, reckless, etc. If the judge is a c*nt, then find a friendly psychologist who confirms you have a gambling and drinking problem, (is Lady C a friendly psychologist?), and you are depressed.

    She is screwed both ways - her credit rating is bad, and she cannot get any money out of you, and you get social housing, you cannot work (depresson/cannot be trusted with money), and you get a nice fat cheque from welfare every week. In the meantime you join MRA's groups and warn men about the perils they face. In the night, fu*k like a rabbit - the more kids you get the more welfare you get - and as one of the offspring is bound to "make it" your pension is secure. (If your a bit older, there are plenty of mail-order ((Thai) brides around - you get a five year guarantee with them)

    Also register her name on our servers in Eastern Europe (where we like the old ways and where dont give a dahm about the law or rights), so that men can check on her and not put their willies in your old business.

    Should you need a new identity or escape with your kids to a nice warm country (the middle east does not deport dads with kids), let us know and we will even book you a ticket. In any case, your probably best off leaving in one of these places, as your country is so politically correct you stand a snowballs chance in hell of having a fair trial or equal rights.

    Yours,
    "The Beast from the East"
    The greatest enemy of the truth is very often not the deliberate lie - but the persistent, persuasive and unrealistic myth that the lie creates

  3. #3
    Douglas's Avatar
    Douglas is online now Administrator
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    Re: The Quality of Advive to men

    I can (and have) forgiven all kinds of things in past relationships. Stealing from me would be a breaker. First time.

    I could forgive adultery better than that: at least with adultery, I could believe that in the moment, me and my relationship was forgotten. Stealing from me is a direct action against me, done with care and planning.

    I don't care if it is a wife doing it to her husband or a man doing it to his wife: it's a direct attack and the first response should be to get them out the house and disable their ability to make any further attacks.


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  4. #4
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    The Possible Human is offline Established Member
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    Re: The Quality of Advive to men

    THis would be a deal breaker/Marriage breaker for me. ID theft can last years and cripple your credit rating, chances at getting a new job, loans, credit cards and the interest rate banks will charge if you do get a loan.

    Leave the trollop.


 

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