Semen Detection Kits

**KellyMac** · #1 18th-April-2008

This is evidently marketed as something women can use on their men's undies, but I think it works better the other way around. You should check out the comments...

Quote:

http://www.salon.com/mwt/broadsheet/...ate/index.html

The evil future is now: Semen detection kits

Good God, what hath "CSI" wrought?

Jezebel brings us news of the do-it-yourself semen detection kit Check Mate, "the easiest and most cost effective way to put an end to the nightmare of suspicion and doubt caused by the infidelity of a cheating spouse or of a sexually active teen. Quickly, easily, and accurately detect and identify semen in undergarments in 5 minutes or less."

You know, plenty of products these days are creepy. But it takes a special product to really give me the creeping fantods, and this one does the trick. (Not to mention it looks about as accurate as a tarot card reading.) I can't imagine the heartbreaking scenarios that precede use of the "Check Mate." My mind reels, taking in a variety of imagined scenarios -- the fuming boyfriend, the screaming wife, the crackpot parents, sniffing their son's disgarded boxers. Man, I was ready to call it a violation when my parents searched my bedroom closet for beer. At least they stayed out of my effing crotch. But hey, folks, only $50! (Frankly, I would love it if this turned out to be a Yale art student's hoax.)

Enjoy the commercial. Shudder.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfjSsl8X120

**frostyboy** · #2 18th-April-2008

If there are traces of a man's semen on his underwear, it doesn't necessarily mean that he's had intercourse - it could simply be the result of a session of onanism.

bobx23456 · #3 18th-April-2008

These have been available on-line for several years now.

A semen detection kid used on a man's underwear will usually test positive. He's the source of the stuff. Most men leak enough during a day to test positive.

A semen detection kit used on a female's underwear will only test positive if she's getting a load from some man.

If she's not gettnig any from her husband then its from some other man. Its a good test for men who aren't getting any at home. Test her underwear before its washed.

Of course if she's screwing her husband too then the results are meaningless. Some women will just screw every man available.

Blessings

Bob

lolintertubes · #4 18th-April-2008

I saw these things years ago. Pretty pointless for all the reasons people have already pointed out.

**frostyboy** · #5 18th-April-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by lolintertubes

Pretty pointless for all the reasons people have already pointed out.

It may be pointless, however in the hands of a paranoid spouse the Check Mate could easily bring about the end of a relationship.

bobx23456 · #6 18th-April-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by frostyboy

It may be pointless, however in the hands of a paranoid spouse the Check Mate could easily bring about the end of a relationship.

Some wives will accuse their husband of cheating whether he's doing so or not. My first wife accused me for years while I was being entirely faithful. I finly got so sick of it that I refused to discuss it with her.

Blessings

Bob

lolintertubes · #7 19th-April-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by frostyboy

It may be pointless, however in the hands of a paranoid spouse the Check Mate could easily bring about the end of a relationship.

I say fuck them. Why would you wanna be in a relationship with a paranoid woman anyway? All this does is give women more ammo to fire against pussy whipped men.

Celtic Druid · #8 22nd-April-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobx23456

Some wives will accuse their husband of cheating whether he's doing so or not.

Which, traditionally has been a perfect female ploy to detract from her own infidelity.

It also constantly puts the man on the defensive (connivance on her part), and in turn, a need to pander to her every whim as a consequence - by supplicating forgiveness for a indiscretion she's convinced him of - irregardless of it's authenticity or not. And, so begins a destructive pattern that will feature predominantly throughout such a 'doomed' relationship!

Celtic Druid · #9 22nd-April-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by KellyMac

This is evidently marketed as something women can use on their men's undies, but I think it works better the other way around.

I agree Kelly. Initially it was probably marketed as something concerned (paranoid?) women could use to allay or confirm their suspicions.

As others have mentioned here, they didn't factor in a man's natural seepage (which can vary in different men).

Now, with a realization that this can be used on the woman with more certainty, maybe they'll repackage it as something both sexes can use.

I doubt very much this company has any gender affiliation or ideology, when you could potentially double your market.

MAUS · #10 26th-April-2008

The youngest male to be sentenced to death in Canada was a certain Stephen Truscott who was 16 at the time.

This was in the 1950's...he was aquitted and exonerated a few weeks ago.

He did indeed have a thing for the girl who was raped and murdered and they did indeed find semen stains in the crotch of his underwear....but he was guilty of nothing more than being a 16 year old boy in the throes of puppy love.

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