I've asked this question many times of male offline friends; so far none could answer or even knew the reason. I'm hoping the anonymity of the net will get me some honest replies.

1. Why are so many men obsessed with the size of their penis? If I had a dime for every male friend who told me his penis size and asked me if its "alright", I'd be richer than Donald Trump right now.

(PS: Don't know about other women, but size never interested me, unless its too big, then I'm outta there!)


2. Why are so many teenage boys (and some men) so worked up because they see white girls/women dating black boys/men? My 15 yr old obsesses about this ALL the time, and so do a lot of his friends, and some men I know too.

3. Why are so many men terrified of even the slightest implication they might be gay?

I can't tell you how many times I was accused of being a lesbian, because I was a tomboy. I didn't care as long as I knew I was straight.

Why are these such big issues with men? I thought I knew a lot about men, but these three questions have me stumped!

Thanks to anyone willing to answer.

I admit to having done this in my youth, I really don't know why though - we're told always through media and such that a small penis is 'bad' to have, we know women 'snigger' about small ones, and they certainly do use it as a humiliation tool - even if it's an untruthful claim, it still humiliates. In my opinion, it's like school yard games... if the women who snigger along with such comments are that stupid to believe everything they're told and follow the pack-mentality in mocking some guy for allegedly having a small penis, they have some growing up to do...and quick.

This has never been an issue for me, so I can't really give any idea of why this is an issue for others.

I guess it's an insult to their sexuality. In MY opinion, gay isn't a good thing - man or woman. I'm not overly religious, but I consider gayness to be an anomaly of nature, not the norm. The core function of humans is to reproduce - two men cannot do that, neither can two women - the only single mix that works, is man and woman. Thus, to be gay is to be actively against nature. God or no God - 'nature' has dictated that it require two people, one of both sexes in order to procreate. Anything else cannot and will not be tolerated in nature - else we would see gays and lesbians having babies galore... but they're not, and there's a reason for that... it's called nature.

I don't think they are 'big' issues for men, they're only an issue when something sparks the reactions you've enquired about.
If they were 'issues' - men would be talking about them frequently... but these are reactions, not actions. If something is bringing these issues to the forefront of a man's attention then he will speak his mind on said issue.

As for me, when I was in school - it offended me if someone suggested I was gay. Now - I mess with people a bit, by being intentionally over-touchy with them. I blame it on my brother in-law (my Sister's ex-husband). He & I used to much about all the time, and today we still do. If someone lays their hand on my lap, I don't flinch at all... I'll take it a step further and play 'chicken' with them. I'll smile, give 'em a wink of the eye and place my hand on their lap specifically to see their reaction. If someone claims I'm gay - I let them wonder whether they've spoken a truth or not... and all the time, I'm laughing at their own insecurity. Anyone who knows me knows full-well I'm not a poop-tube digger... but anyone who knows me isn't everyone.

My biggest beef with women / dating is seeing absolute drop-dead-gorgeous women dating the most seriously ugly guy you could ever imagine. You have to wonder - wtf
Either that guy has got some serious power in his hip-thrusting, or he's loaded to the extreme with money. Having said that, it's not an 'issue' for me even then, I think it's kinda funny how shallow they both are: He's with her for her looks, she's with him for his money...

I used to chanop for AOL chat servers, and I'd make the joke that my 'little man' was only two and a half inches when excited. Again, if anyone wanted to believe that - they're stupid. Simple as.

Annette- I can honestly say, NONE of the things you listed have affected me

Why- I've given more time thinking about what meal I'm going to eat for dinner than any of the above

And I'm deadly serious

I am always one for debate- but I really couldn't give a shit about those 3 issues

The race issue might be an American thing, I don't know.

Marx, about that issue of seeing gorgeous women with ugly guys...I don't think I ever dated a guy who was what anyone could call blatantly "ugly", but I did date a couple of guys in my time who were nothing special to look at. I'm more visual than perhaps the average female, but not as visual as a male...so for me, even if a guy is not that good-looking at first, if he turns out to be a nice guy, a guy who has a warped, black sense of humor...the looks won't matter after a while.Just about any guy can "grow" on a woman if he is decent enough.

1) Because size, quite simply, matters. Whether or not having a large penis actually makes you more sexually potent is irrelevant; women perceive men with larger penises to be so and men know this. It is no different to how women worry about the size of their breasts, if men started finding women with flat chests attractive then women would desire to look like that.

2) That must be an American thing I have never encountered this once.

3) Because gayness runs counter to manhood, it is as simple as that. I am in agreement with Marx, if you are gay you are not a proper man, there is no two ways about it. It is abnormal, unnatural and unhealthy. I'm not going to try and stop people doing it if that's there thing but nor will I view it as an equal and legitimate alternative to heterosexuality.

Well I must agree with everyone on questions 1 and 3 as for question 2 here we go. American males until recently were told that black men want to take your women from you. Which is blatantly false or there wouldn't be any black people left as they would have been bred to completely white by now. I think this is becoming less of an issue as time goes by and we see more white people acting like a member of black culture. So I would say it is just left over cultural bias that has to work itself out over time. And remeber before you judge all American white men at the same time that the civil rights movement was going on so was the constant threat of communism. So we were being told that the commies want to take your fredom from you and someone else was saying blacks want to take you women from you. It was a time filled with hysteria. Communism,Civil rights,sexual revolution,two different wars both involving communists. So I think a bias occured that was passed down from generation to generation.

The race thing might be a holdover from slavery days too, something those in the UK wouldn't have an issue in.

I do know that most people I meet don't seem to have a problem with white men having sex with black women; their only problem is white women with black men. I have to say, from my personal observation, until recently in the USA the only white women who dated black men were fat, usually also ugly women. Just my observation!

As for the penis size issue, that's actually one reason why I would never have dated a black man when I was single; I'd heard they had big penises. Maybe I'm not like other women (or maybe I am!), but I think a woman would want girth more than length. Length can be very painful (I speak from one really horrible experience in that regard.)

I have this one male friend who I kinda feel sorry for (though a lot of men would give anything to be him)...he is huge (so he says, about 11 inches)...and women won't date him anymore after they sleep with him once. He said they all said the same thing, that he is too huge and it hurts. I advised him to find black women, because they supposedly like men to be big. (shrug)

In short, size matters, though the usual caveat is that size doesn't matter as much as men think it does. In order to have a happy healthy relationship, regular sex which is pleasurable to both partners is par for the course. A penis of insufficient size won't be able to adequately pleasure one portion of a couple. Therefore, there's a degree to which we're overcompensating by worrying too much about whether or not we're 'adequate' to the task of having good sexual relations with out partners. Sex matters to us, and therefore as the penis is our focus and major source of pleasure, we deeply want our partner to share in our enjoyment. If she does not, we worry that sex will stop. This is a major concern, since sex is where evolution has programmed us to feel the most fulfilled, and satisfied.

This is strange. I've never experienced this. Of course, we've been taught that this is a racist attitude, but I've never seen anything like that.

This isn't true for all men, but it comes in part from a desire to fit in with the majority. Since gay men form perhaps 10% of the population, being gay is clearly abnormal. This is of course reinforced heavily by culture, but there's also an evolutionary reason that it is only fraction of the population; namely, being gay is evolutionary suicide. If one favors one's own gender to the exclusion of all others, one does not reproduce and therefore that person leaves no descendants, thus being gay is an evolutionary dead-end. That is by its very nature contrary to masculinity, and so by default is something to be avoided, thus explaining the reasons that virtually all cultures consider homosexuality taboo.

There's no single all satisfying answer to this question. Some would say, that it's because all humans are terrified of death, and will grasp to any hope of immortality, even if it's only vicarious immortality as carried onward through bloodlines. Or maybe it's just simple evolutionary imperative. More probably, you know about men, you just don't know much about where he came from.

Same reason women want bigger breasts.

Same reason black women get upset with black men dating white women.

Same reason women wont admit their sightly bitchy and a cunt.

No offense intended of course. Evolution is very new to us, and many of the implications are still being worked out. Nobody really knows the whole of where humanity came from.