Life is hard for men these days, high unemployment. Unfair divorce laws.......
There have been some changes here and there, it seems there is a slight change a foot.
I believe the biggest problem the MRM has are men that attack other men and men that don't speak up in public, when they see and hear misandry. I truly believe that is the only way things will ever truly change.
There are many situations I just can’t seem to get out of my mind! … And time and time again, it’s the same old story! Over the past few years, I have talked with thousands of men concerning relationships that have gone wrong. Ironically, many of these men were also victims of Identity Theft.
In these romantic relationships where Identity Theft (or fraud) was committed against men, the women who committed the crimes were able to steal tens of thousands of dollars! They were also able to use and abuse the bank accounts and credit accounts of the men, without the men ever knowing, until it was too late!
Simply stated: All of these men were played for fools!
So, whether you are in a long term relationship or just starting out, it is always a good idea to have a back ground check done on your partner, if you begin to notice odd occurrences or unexplainable situations or if a pattern starts to emerge that does not make sense: i.e., missing mail, missing identification, missing bank statements, missing credit card statements, etc.
The first thing you need to do is get a copy of your credit report! Your credit report could contain information that there may indicate there is be a problem! Upon receiving your credit report, look for discrepancies (fraudulent information) in your file! Here is a list of items you should check and look for: couple.jpg1. Is your personal information wrong? i.e., the misspelling of your name or the use of initials.
2. Does your address and/or employment history contain errors or information that does not match or is incorrect?
3. Are there variations in your Social Security Number or the Social Security Number that was used to open the credit account?
4. Are there credit accounts you did not open or any debts you can not account for?
5. Are you receiving calls from merchants, businesses or collection agencies claiming you have outstanding debt or bills that have not been paid or for items you have not purchased?
6. Have you received credit cards you did not order?
7. Are you being denied credit when you know you have a good or favorable credit score?
8. Do you fail to receive bills or other mail? Remember you should follow up with creditors if your bills don’t arrive or don’t arrive on time. A missing bill could mean an identity thief has taken over your account and changed your billing address to cover their tracks.
The above factors are clear indicators that you may be a victim!
Most of the men (Identity Theft Victims) I worked with, dated these women for several months. Some of theses men discovered their woman was sharing their private financial information with other men. While others found out their woman obtained credit cards in their name or she was now listed as an authorized signer on his credit cards.
In one instance, the woman had a male accomplice contact the credit card company, claiming to be victim and then ordered a card for her. In another particular situation, the woman went as far as to go shopping at the local mall with her male accomplice, using victim’s good credit while he was at work!
Reality: When these male victims contacted the credit card company to alert them to the fraud that had been committed, … guess what? He had to prove to them that he did not order the card for her! … And let me tell you, it is very difficult, almost impossible to prove that you did not authorize the use of your credit card.
The devastating financial impact of these situations can be immeasurable! … And it can take you years to unravel scheme or to payoff the debt!
Most of the women who commit these kinds of crimes, know your schedule! They know when your mail is delivered and they know what type of credit accounts and/or bills you have.
If you think you may be a victim of Identity Theft, contact the credit reporting agencies immediately and have an alert placed on your credit file. Contact the merchants you are not familiar with (who say you owe them money) and inquire as to how and when these accounts were obtained. Once you have done your homework, you should contact your local law enforcement agency and file a criminal complaint against the person(s) responsible! You should also always contact an attorney when in doubt!
If you have questions that you would like to ask, you may contact me via phone or email!
“Excellence in Investigations”
Have you had your ID stolen? Know someone who has? Tell us about it in the comments.
Remember: There are hundreds of excellent and practical suggestions on how to protect yourself in the book: “How To Avoid ‘Getting Screwed’ When Getting Laid!”
We would greatly appreciate your comments about
It's just been brought to my attention that a troll has been seen round my blog well since my Black dog episodes are of interest to some but why my appendage is of so much concern worries me as its no good for anything but pissing out of.
So then where are we in our wonderful world oh yes cutting of male appendages well i suppose if you need one with you 24 hours a day you could always go buy a rampant rabbit one it hurts less for the male and it always stays rigid as it don't need a blood flow to raise it up.
the rod is cast the bait is set I'll just sit back and wait
I hope to get comments explaining why men like to be sexually dominated.
As of today, I’ve been homeless for three years.
My father died last year, and left me over 11 thousand dollars, with a life insurance policy. To a broke and homeless person, that is quite a fortune.
With that money, I bought some dentures for this girl I was caring for in Indiana, and I gave some money to the man I lived with in Indiana, who died last May. The girl I rescued from Atlanta last year. She was homeless there, as I was. The man we were living with I met online, and he invited us to come live with him there. Also with that money, I bought a very beat up truck.
In July of last year, impulsively, I left a note for my friends in Indiana, letting them know I was leaving. I left some more money for them, and told them I was driving back to Missouri, to attempt to mend severely fractured relationships with those I have loved the most in my life. My family lives in Missouri, and my daughter.
Soon after beginning this trip, I was pulled over by a police officer, for an expired plate on the truck, along with dysfunctional tail lights on this truck. The police officer could of arrested me for an outstanding warrant I had in Missouri. Instead, I told him my story about my trip back home to hopefully see my daughter. He let me continue my journey back to Missouri.
I arrived in my home town in Missouri that night, and checked into a hotel. The next day, I sent an email message to my own family members, as well as the family members of my ex wife. I made them aware I was back home, and I desperately wanted to mend relationships with anyone willing to mend their relationship with me. I also let them know I very much wanted to see my daughter, as I had not seen her in two years.
The day following that email message to them, they had me followed to a library in that town I was at. I was arrested at that library, due to an outstanding warrant I had in the state of Missouri. There was a 2000 dollar cash only bond on this warrant. Fortunately, at the time of my arrest, I had over 5000 dollars cash on me at the time. The police officer who arrested me was quite pleased I had this money on me. He realized I was set up by others with this arrest, and did not want to throw me in jail.
The police officer took me to the station, and I helped this officer process me out of this police station. While in the booking area of this station, my ex wife called, and spoke with the police officer who arrested me. She wanted to make sure I was unable to pay the 2000 dollar bond. To her surprise, I did pay the bond, which is what the police officer told her.
When I was released from this police station, I asked the arresting police officer to call my ex wife, and let her know I had no intention of harming her, or anyone else. Again, I moved back home to mend relationships, and not harm anyone. He shook my hand, this police officer, and promised to call my ex wife.
Yet I learned later, that after this phone call my ex wife made to this police officer, she was having police escorts wherever she went. She was also having the police patrol her house, and the houses of her family members, due to the fear she had that I was out to harm others.
I finally arranged to see my daughter the beginning of August of last year. We met at a restaurant and the night was not bad, considering all the trauma inflicted on her by her mother and others. We shared some smiles and laughs, but she was very distant with me at this restaurant. She never chose to meet with me after this meeting at this restaurant. I learned soon after this meeting with my daughter that she has a lot of hatred and anger towards me, due to the lies told to her about me by her mother and others.
The next month, I had court for this arrest. My crime was frequently violating a restraining order against me, by writing and publishing essays related to my situation with my ex wife, and so forth. Emailing these essays to my ex wife and her family members violated the restraining order. I did this often, in the past few years. My crime was also violating probation for leaving the state of Missouri.
In court, the judge called me up to the stand. The judge recommended I acquire legal counsel. I asked for a public defender, from the judge. The judge said I could hire my own lawyer with the 2000 dollars he was holding for me. Instead, I chose to defend myself in court that day. The judge seemed elated about this decision I made, and asked me to have a seat in the court.
The female prosecutor soon showed up in the court room. This is the woman who had been assisting my ex wife in destroying me for the past two years. She sat next to me in court, and let me have it for the crimes I committed. At that time, I was facing a manditory 6
This is a submission I put together to give a different perspective on the issue.
Unfortunately I didn't get anyone to proofread it (ran out of time). (Submissions had to be in by the end of August, 2012)
Also with more time, I would have put more thought into structuring what I was going to say and how I was going to say it.
Prostitution is not something I think about much. However, I dislike the Swedish Model which motivated me to put this together.
ANONPROST01 Background information:
I have never used a sex worker. I do not have any financial or other connections with the industry.
I have observed and taken part in various discussions and debates on internet forums and believe different voices are required in this debate to give more balance to discussions. Our court system involves equal representation but I can foresee that mainly "politically correct" views will be given in oral testimony and possibly also written testimony. I only realised quite late one could make anonymous submissions so I imagine lots of people who might have given comments (the many people who comment in internet discussions) haven’t because they didn’t know they could be anonymous.
I have lived all my life in Ireland (i.e. am eligible to vote, etc.) Factual information:
(i) In the UK, "ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry" (ESRC=Economic and Social Research Council) by Dr. Nick Mai (ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry) found that: "the large majority of interviewed migrant workers in the UK sex industry are not forced nor trafficked"
(ii) The same report ["ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry" (ESRC=Economic and Social Research Council) by Dr. Nick Mai (ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry)] found that: “Working in the sex industry is often a way for migrants to avoid the unrewarding and sometimes exploitative conditions they meet in non-sexual jobs”
(iii) The same report ["ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry" (ESRC=Economic and Social Research Council) by Dr. Nick Mai (ESRC Project: Migrant Workers in the UK Sex Industry)] found that: “By working in the sex industry, many interviewees are able to maintain dignified living standards in the UK while dramatically improving the living conditions of their families in the country of origin.”
(iv) This piece in the Guardian, "Prostitution and trafficking – the anatomy of a moral panic" by Nick Davies Prostitution and trafficking (Tuesday 20 October 2009), explains how unreliable the statistics are that are used in debates about trafficking in the UK.
(v) Many jobs carry a risk of injury or harm to mental or physical health (now or in the future), with severe injury or death not being uncommon in some occapations.
Detailed figures for fatalities in the US broken down by occupation category are available from the Bureau of Labor Statistics e.g. http://www.bls.gov/iif/oshwc/cfoi/cfoi_rates_2010hb.pdf and http://www.bls.gov/iif/oshwc/cfoi/cfch0009.pdf .
Just to give people an idea of what is being talked about, here are some figures for occupations with higher risk: Fatal occupational injuries, total hours worked, and rates of fatal occupational injuries by selected worker characteristics, occupations, and industries, civilian workers, 2010 Fatal Injury Rate2 Fishers and related fishing workers 152 Logging workers 93.5 Aircraft pilots and flight engineers 70.6 Miscellaneous extraction workers 64.2 Farmers and ranchers 42.5 Mining machine operators 37 Roofers 32.4 Refuse and recyclable material collectors 29.8 Driver/sales workers and truck drivers 23 Industrial machinery installation, repair, and maintenance workers 20.7 2 The rate represents the number of fatal occupational injuries per 100,000
"We were train wrecks for different reasons, so we were perfect for each other."
by Dan Abshear
About two years ago, my then wife of 20 years decided to falsely accuse me of violently abusing her. A restraining order was issued against me by her as well, so I was evicted out of my own home. Soon after that, I was arrested related to these false accusations and wrongfully incarcerated for over a month.
While in jail, I spoke with quite a few men who were abused by the family law system. Most shocking to me at the time were those men on their way to prison for failure to pay child support. Most of these men were without income, yet they were convicted of this 'crime."
In April of last year, I spent a week on the mental health ward of the veterans administration hospital in Atlanta, for suicidal ideation, among other mental issues. They determined I was a drug addict, so I checked myself into the veterans administration substance abuse treatment program in May of last year.
After completing the VA substance abuse treatment program, I was homeless once again. The VA has a homeless program for veterans, so I entered this program. They placed me in an apartment with 5 other men, whose lives had been wrecked, as mine had been only two years ago.
Most of the men I encountered and became friends within the VA system were very poor, and older black men. It's a subculture I was completely unaware of, until this program. Many had spent a great deal of their lives incarcerated, and many were drug addicts. However, most of these men are very intelligent, and kinder than your average American citizen.
In less than a year, three of these friends I acquired took their own lives. Their pain quite obviously was equal or greater than the pain I continue to experience due to being destroyed by my ex wife. I continue to miss these friends.
Last Summer, while in this VA homeless program, I met a veteran girl going through the program with me. We were train wrecks for different reasons and therefore perfect for each other. Like me, she is not very attractive, physically, and is homeless, like me, but for different reasons.
This girl, like many of us, has been abused, physically and otherwise, for most of her life. She never had a decent lover/boyfriend, she tells me. I care for her unintentionally in various ways, and she thinks the world of such acts I may do for her. That does it for me- loving and caring for another girl authentically. That completes me. Most men have been programmed to view women, and their roles in our lives potentially, unrealistically.
The VA also has a program for unemployed veterans to work at their hospital for a period of 6 months, tax free. It's under the table money, which this girl and I both desperately needed. So throughout last winter, she and I both worked in this program, and saved a few thousand dollars between us.
During that time, a man I met online in Indiana offered his farm house to us there. Since our time in the homeless program with the VA was soon ending, we took him up on his offer. This is now were we currently live, with this man in Indiana.
We have no idea what tomorrow will bring us. We live day by day here, as we did with the VA homeless program in Atlanta. But we have greater peace now. We have greater freedom. And most importantly, we have each other. It makes each day worthwhile. Without each other, our lives were vacant, I believe. Our live our void of any desirable future- without each other. It's that way with most homeless people, I've discovered. They are alone. Completely alone. This girl and I- we have hope. And hope is a very good thing in the human life always.
The veteran's administration was very good for me in a number of ways. Their hospital was top notch, I felt, as a patient there. I continued to receive mental health therapy from them once discharged from their hospital. As a former patient caregiver myself, I found the caregivers associated with that hospital exceptionable.
I found the substance abuse treatment I received from them quite interesting, which lasted several weeks. My undergrad from college is in behavioral sciences, so I was only aware of such programs from that knowledge only, before entering this program.
They spoke of free will frequently during our daily group sessions- virtually ignoring the biological basis for addiction. That would be the only complaint I have of such a program. Well, that and their insistence that some God can replace our addictions. PLEASE………….
I'm also thankful for the VA homeless program, which gave me a roof over my head for several months. They never really helped me get a job, however. Yet, they insisted I somehow
I Married a Lesbian
May 24, 2011
by Dan Abshear
While being married to a lesbian for 20 years was painful, it actually made me a better person.
I met my ex-wife when I was about 14 years old. We grew up in the same small town in Missouri. She and I are 4th cousins as well.
She took an interest in me when I was 21 years old. She called me when I was home on leave while serving in the U.S. Navy. This was the first time I ever had any girl call me for a date. Because of this, I canceled a date I had another girl. We got married three years or so after this first date.
Coming from a rather abusive and broken family myself, I was determined to have a very moral and meaningful marriage with my wife.
My marriage is called a mixed orientation marriage, and millions exist in the United States alone. Most are unknowingly married to homosexual men, and the rest of us are or were married to homosexual women.
I mean, think about it: How do you really know about the sexual orientation of your spouse? Not all of us have gay-dar that is sharp enough to detect such a deception.
However, one thing that should be obvious to any man in my situation is that your spouse is unresponsive to you, sexually and otherwise. As such, I found myself trying to discover why. Her being a lesbian was the furthest thing from my mind, at least during the first few years of our marriage. So I immediately starting asking myself, 'why is my wife, who I loved so much, ignoring me?
Initially, I thought my wife was not attracted to me, physically. She was sexually impotent with me, and this puzzled me. So, I began to exercise very aggressively and intensely. This would include such activities as weightlifting and long distance bicycling.
While rather puny when I got married, I developed into quite a attractive and sturdy young man. This was all to please my wife and gain her affection. I improved my diet and continued these exercise habits until the age of 40.
Since this didn't increase her intimacy toward me, I began to wonder if she wanted me to make more money. The first six or so years of our marriage, I barely made more than minimum wage. We were very poor, and in debt.
So, I somehow became a corporate executive with one of the largest and most respected pharmaceutical corporations in the world. Soon after this, my lesbian spouse and I were set, financially. Unfortunately, this was not the answer to her lack of affection towards me, either.
My last hope at discovering why my lesbian spouse was so apathetic was that I was not treating her the way I should. Now, I was a patient caregiver for about a dozen years- I always thought I was one of the nicest and caring individuals that existed.
But, I was determined to discover why my wife was so emotionally vacant. So, I tried to become a more gentle and effective lover with her. In addition, I tried very hard to assure her of my own love.
I'd kiss her, and really mean it, with my love for her. I'd be very polite with her always- a gentleman constantly. Unfortunately, this transformation did not alter her behavior towards me.
In the years that followed, I noticed my wife taking what I view as an unusual interest in other women. In fact, I would classify her relationships with some other women as intimate. To this day, I do not know if my wife had sexual relationships with those women.
So the year is now 2003, and my wife has yet to acknowledge her homosexual tendencies. We are raising our daughter at this point, so her behavior towards other women was becoming even more of a concern. I insisted that she seek professional help.
She only saw a psychiatrist and therapist a few times. She never confided in me so I visited the same psychiatrist. He told me that my wife was in fact a lesbian, and that it would destroy me in time if I did not divorce her.
It is now the year 2005. At this point, I was not really shocked. By 2006, I had given up on our relationship. Rather than act , I just shut down almost completely. My career ended, and I stopped exercising.
Interestingly, our sex life actually improved a great deal. It appears that my knowing she was a lesbian may have given her some freedom.
I suffered from severe depression and took refuge in prescription drugs. My wife finally ended our marriage - and she did so by falsely accusing me of domestic violence.
When you love something, or someone, you will discover their secrets.
My now ex wife never hated me for anything I ever did to her. In fact, I was a damn good husband and father. She
Updated 18th-September-2012 at 06:43 PM by quiact
The number of actions deemed “illegal” continues to grow. Seen through that arbitrary filter that means more individuals who were at one time “law-abiding” are now viewed as “criminals.” That makes it more and more likely that you will see the inside of a jail cell. (Such a trend will continue unless we each stop believing that words put on paper by some strangers make once unjust actions just.) Many people use the time to reflect. Some, like Dan Abshear who authored the below, share their thoughts and writings with others, acting as both an outlet and a way to personalize the harm caused by unquestioning allegiance to the Statist Quo that allows for the mass caging of humans for profit. -Pete, www.copblock.org
In the fall of 2009, I spent over a month in jail, for the first time in my life. To achieve some level of freedom, I wrote, and I wrote a lot. I composed over 20 thousand words while in jail.
Most of these words were letters to Jacki- a girl I dated 25 years ago, and who I lived with after my release from jail. The living arrangement with her lasted about 6 months.
While in jail, one’s mind becomes altered often. There is great misery, with little hope. My state of mind is reflected in what I wrote while there.The following are the letters I wrote to Jacki, while in jail:
I’m starting to get comfortable here, and this frightens me a bit. It’s just that I’m powerless at this point about progressing my case that resulted in me being here now. I have a court date on October 15th, and I will ask to speak on my own behalf to the judge as well as the prosecutor so I can negotiate with them about my situation. I’m very anxious to start my life again. I will do this as I recover from the trauma inflicted upon me, and as I miss my dear Hayley. Both cause me to experience severe intrinsic, and silent, pain.
This is nothing short of unimaginable hell, as this pain I feel is indescribable- it is in fact worse than any kind of chronic torture I can possibly conceive.
I was chatting with a deaf kid named William here in jail with me. We got here on the same day, and he needs a lawyer as well as me. William may be going to prison for theft.
I’m cutting out words from various magazines on this Friday night to use when I write Hayley the next time. These letters that she and I are doing back and forth are really making me very happy in the midst of great misery.
It’s Saturday morning now, and I just got off the phone with you. I’ll be thinking of your voice all day, and for the days to come. Do not worry about me, please. I can and do take care of myself. Jail is jail. It is not suppose to be enjoyable.
I’ve told my story to more than one here in jail about the circumstances of my divorce. They were surprised at the lack of retaliation for injuries perceived or otherwise.
Many are violent here, of course. This explains why law enforcement dudes automatically presumed that I was violent. Violent because of those who are my fellow inmates now. Many are very mean.
We finally got to go to the library today here in jail. I got some magazines. No dirty magazines here, I’m sorry to say. There is also a law library here in jail, and I’ll request to go to this library soon.
It’s Saturday night, and I called a friend of mine from high school a moment ago. I asked him to contact our other friends from high school to try and get me a legal agent. he and these other friends have had legal issues in the past of their own, and they know legal agents as a result.
I’ll not be able to mail this letter to you till Tuesday. This gives me two full days to continue to write to you, and revise what I write. I tend to do this often.
I’ve felt a need tonight to hold Molly (my ex-wife) and my daughter Hayley, and cry with them. This hate that has infected Molly needs to be treated in such a way. It needs to be cured by love.
I’ll never have my family back again, and I have to learn to live with this. But I’m compelled to fight evil such as this in my life now whenever I possibly can. Always. It hurts.
It’s Sunday morning here in jail, and I just shared some candy with other inmates. This elevated my popularity greatly, cause I really do not fit in here with them, overall.
Justin takes a particular interest with you here in jail, as I speak of you to him often. He is a 25 year old good looking guy, and he is a new dad. His son was born as he is in jail with me.
He witnessed me illuminate when I first heard from you here in jail. And I showed him letters you sent me that I wrote to you way over 20 years ago, which I find incredible, what I wrote.
The following is a continuation of notes I composed
"I think the school staff were man-haters, and resented me because, as a doting father, I upset their prejudices. They thought incest was the only possible explanation for a father's love."
by Dan Abshear
In January 2007, staff at my eight-year-old daughter's public school in Missouri interrogated her for an hour to determine if I had molested her. There was absolutely no reason for them to do this.
I worked out of my home at the time and largely raised my daughter, while my now ex-wife worked. I had established rituals during her school days.
These included taking her to our favorite local doughnut shop in the morning and often bringing lunch to her at school.
During my visits to my daughter's school. I always found the teachers to be very warm and kind people.
However, the administrative staff were rather distant judging by their body language, and their unwillingness to interact with me. They were mostly middle-aged women.
On one unforgettable day, they interrogated my daughter for about an hour. When I picked her up, she was crying.
She said she was asked leading questions such as, "did your daddy ever touch you there? Do you think your daddy likes touching you there?" The answer to such questions was 'no,' of course.
I spoke with her for hours that night, which was difficult for me. In the days that followed, she did not appear permanently scared by that interrogation.
My daughter was completely unaware that parents were even capable of such acts described in graphic detail by school staff.
There was no evidence for these allegations. My daughter was and is a straight "A" student, and an incredibly balanced individual. What caused my daughter's school to make these outrageous charges and traumatize my daughter remains unknown to me this this day.
WIFE BRUSHES IT OFF
Her mother was unresponsive regarding these false allegations.
An expected reaction might have been one of shock and disbelief.
Instead she displayed apathy.
My then wife, who was in fact a radical feminist lesbian, and likely a psychopath, became good friends with the rather attractive female principal of this school in the following weeks.
Her behavior was the first red flag that she posed a danger to myself and my family.
I started to research the legalities and learned that schools get a lot of money from the government for prosecuting fathers like myself, regardless if he is guilty or innocent. I realized that I might go to prison if this situation were not resolved.
So I sent some legally threatening emails to the principal including a threat to sue the school district and contact the media. They dropped it and I continued to have lunch with my daughter at her school.
On one occasion, I returned home to find a police officer waiting for me.
The police officer told me to stop going to my daughter's school, because school staff told the police I had a 'threatening disposition'.
I stopped going. I think the school staff were man-haters, and resented me because, as a doting father, I upset their prejudices. They thought incest was the only possible explanation for a father's love.
Due to her mother implementing parental alienation, I've not see or spoken to my now 13-year-old daughter in almost two years now. On Father's Day, she sent me an email. (Excerpt:"My braces r off and my hairs long. I'm also 5'8 now!!!")
All things considered, she sounded really good. I continue to hand write Hayley once a week, and send her money when I can. Rarely does she write back, but I still continue to write her.
The email absolutely made my day, and decreased my sadness about the absence of my daughter, greatly. I suffer from chronic depression due to my daughter being gone from my life right now